Any one else feeling overwhelmed with all the doom and gloom in the world at the moment? It is hard to stay positive and upbeat when there seems to be a constant barrage of bad news with no sign of an end in sight.
Personally, I have stopped watching the news and only glance at news online once a day to get a rough idea of what is happening. I find if I spend too much time reading or listening to the news I just end up confused.
So I have decided to tell you some stories or confessions that may provide some light hearted relief. Some of the following are memories that my brain uses to either cheer me up or embarrass me when I am feeling tense. If it isn’t embarrassing for someone on some level is it even funny?
Here’s a tip for any parents that are weaning their children. Do not continue to feed your child something that initiates a funny reaction just in case you find yourself in this situation. There are so many foods that children try such as oranges, lemons, onions, carrots, brocolli, pasta, the list goes on and on. So many foods can illicit an expression or reaction which makes your heart skip a little. So much so that you will want to see the reaction over and over and over again.
When my son was weaning we went to visit my Mum. We were feeding him his lunch, sat beside a big corner fish tank because he enjoyed watching the fish swimming. Once he had finished his savoury it was time for dessert so we gave him some strawberry jelly. He played with it for a short time then I put a small bit on a spoon. He chewed it for a while, savouring the flavour and proceeded to swallow.
The moment he swallowed this new substance brought me such joy. To me, his response was better than gold dust. As the jelly slid down his throat it was like he morphed into a gelatinous being himself, wobbling all over the place. After a few more bites my Mum tells me that she has other flavours and suggests we try a different flavour to see if he enjoyed those options as much as he enjoyed the strawberry.
My memory is a bit hazy but I think the other options were blackcurrant and raspberry. It was sugar free (apparently) so my naïve baby brain self didn’t think it would pose a problem.
My son tried all of the flavours on offer, raspberry and strawberry were winners, the blackcurrant triggered a look of disgust. Anyway a lovely time was had by all but nap time was drawing near so I loaded him in to his pram and proceeded to walk the long way home, thinking that he would drop off to sleep along the way.
Surprise, surprise he didn’t fall asleep…at all. Several hours passed and I was pulling my hair out, the whole routine was out of sync and despite my best efforts I could not settle my child. He was not interested in sleep.
I tried every trick I could think of, pacing our living room playing Frank Turner on the stereo followed by Ferocious Dog (normally guaranteed to trigger sleep) but to no avail. He would just be looking at me with his bright wide blue eyes that said “no chance Mother, lets play!”
Anyway when my husband arrived home like a knight in shining armour, after what felt like an eternity later, the penny dropped. All it took was one question “what has he eaten today sweet”…whoops.
The following is the moment that I realised my daughter is as crazy and funny as me. She was 3 at the time and we were having our weekly family roast sat at the dining table. As any parent will know this is an important part of family life and apparently important for your child development, so I have heard anyway.
Effectively we should approach mealtimes as a teaching moment, particularly family meals, to show our children what is acceptable behaviour and to teach them table manners.
So we have eaten our roast dinner (yummy it was too)the table has been cleared and we are sitting around telling jokes, making funny faces at each other when suddenly my daughter headbutts the table making a loud bang noise. At first, we were shocked and obviously concerned that she had hurt herself or was having some sort of seizure.
So we sit there in shocked silence staring at her and she does it again. My son is watching her in astonishment but with an excited glint in his eye, subconsciously urging her to do it again. So she does and he starts roaring with laughter. The more he laughs the more she headbutts the table, the more confused my husband and I become. Our daughter is hitting her head repeatedly on the table and both she and her brother are laughing hysterically.
It got to the point that we as the bewildered parents are having to restrain and remove her from the table, followed by exasperation of having to try and prevent her from returning to the table. The whole fiasco stemmed from the fact that she liked the noise it made and she enjoyed making her brother laugh. It has been a recurring theme ever since.
My next confession is a biggie. I wonder how many other people would admit to this one. Now I think that I am a funny person, I find myself hilarious a lot of the time. Don’t worry, I am sure that no one else finds me humorous, my children certainly do not think I am amusing at all, after the following disclosure you will understand why.
I have a very eclectic taste in music but recently to motivate myself I have been listening to a lot of music from the 80’s. There are certain areas of housework that I am really not a fan of. The main one since becoming a mother of a boy is cleaning the toilet. Its a horrible, smelly, pointless but essential task which I would happily avoid.
How is that funny I hear you ask? I am glad you ask. I have come up with my own way, inspired by my daughter during lockdown. I put my cleaning products in the toilet, put on a track, (it has to be a good one with a strong rhythm such as Radio GaGa by Queen) turn up the volume, pick up the brush, strike a pose and lose myself in the music.
The children have opened the toilet door and caught me with one arm in the air toilet brush in the bowl, singing and scrubbing the toilet to the beat. “All you hear is” scrub scrub “Radio Gaga” scrub scrub… (admit it, you sang that)it works, its a win win, clean toilet, child rolling their eyes, mummy laughing about the whole thing and all is right with the world.
Dancing is brilliant for the soul. I am not talking “real” dancing, I mean the dancing like nobody is watching in your kitchen. The dance moves that are reserved for the privacy of your own home. If you do not do this, you should try it. Many a bad mood has been turned around in my household with a silly dance.
There are many situations where it can go one of two ways. When you pick the children up from school and they are a little quiet I become irritating and embarrassing until they giggle or smile. Tools for this vary, it can be skipping back to the car, prodding them, initiating a tickle war or talking to them in a silly voice to mention a few. I always get my own way one way or another and I believe they feel lighter by the time we get back to the house.
It isn’t always a guarantee, but its a start. I do not consider myself a “fun” mum. I have never been great at day trips for example but if they relax a little they are more likely to tell me about their day. If something has happened that was not very nice or they didn’t like, it provides us with the opportunity to talk about.
Another thing I like to do is make people jump, particularly my husband. As I have already said I think I am hilarious, he on the other hand, would label me as irritating. You decide.
Sometimes, when my husband showers, I listen outside the bathroom door for a while before sneaking in and poking my head round the end of the shower curtain when he is washing his hair. While he is happily washing his hair I hold my breath, make my best facial impression of the Joker (see attached picture) and wait for him to open his eyes. His reaction has not disappointed me yet and, luckily, he has not caused himself an injury due to jumping out of his skin.
The key for this to work is patience. It is one of the few times that I am thankful that his hearing is a little fuzzy. You also need to make sure that you position yourself while his eyes are closed otherwise the gig is up. It is so worth the effort though. There are many ways in which I annoy him but this is by far one of my favourites.
So I will leave you with that for now and hope that my confessions have made you smile or caused a small chuckle so you may now feel a little lighter yourselves.
Mumma Bear Roars 