My Reasons

I apologise for the following, poetry is not my strong point but this week is proving to be a hard week for me. I tend to withdraw from my family when I am struggling to process my thoughts. I am conscious that this could have a detrimental impact on my children, despite my best efforts to keep my troubles hidden.

So I have penned this instead. I am not sure why other than as an outlet for how I feel and how important they are to me even when they are testing their boundaries.

Mummy is sorry that she is not her best today,

Mummy is sorry that it was same yesterday,

Mummy is sorry that she is too tired to play and she doesnt know what else to say,

Mummy is feeling a little sad and down but please know you are why I am still around,

You give me a reason to keep fighting each day,

You give me a reason to see past the clouds of grey,

You give me a reason to smile when I am blue,

You give me a reason to stand tall and walk through,

I promise it won’t always be this way,

I promise I am trying my best to keep you safe,

I promise one day I will be fun and I promise I am not always so glum,

But sometimes Mummy needs a little help to see past all the pain,

Sometimes Mummy needs someone to hold her hand and make her stomp,

My hope for you two is that you will always know how deep my love is for you and even though we argue and fight nothing will ever stop me from being here for you.

You are my reason now , you were my reason then and I know that you will be my reason when you are grown, yes even then.

So thank you for giving me strength when I am feeling weak,

Thank you for making this Mumma Bear roar and not be quiet and meek,

but most of all after this week, thank you for just being you.