T*ts Out, All Shout!

Social media has an extraordinary power over our everyday lives. Sometimes the effect can be negative but there are occasions that the impact can be positive.

I am going to tell you a story of a positive experience that I have had recently as a result of social media. During lockdown I began following a lot of different accounts in thinking that it may help me maintain my sanity.

Please be warned, the following is about my personal experience and I apologise in advance if it causes any offence.

This approach had mixed results, however, one of the accounts that I had been following previously works with a charity relating to breast cancer and raising awareness of what signs we should be looking out for.

One day during the summer I was hiding from my children watching various stories on my phone when something caught my attention. It was effectively a poster that had been created by this charity highlighting the different changes that we need to be aware of.

Having had two children I had noticed some changes with my breasts but had not really paid much attention but one of the changes I had noticed was listed as something that should be checked out with a GP.

Typically, me being me didn’t think much more about it but as time passed I started to notice some puckering around my left nipple and this particular post kept flashing in my brain. In addition to the physical change I could see I was also aware of pain in my left breast which was different to the usual ache and tenderness that we often experience. So in November, when I could not ignore it any longer I made a phone call to my GP Surgery.

This led to an appointment with one of the GP’s where they conducted an examination. This was a first for me and I have to say it was one of the most surreal experiences of my life. It also highlighted that the way I tend to deal with awkward or scary situations is to find the humour.

I waited for my appointment with no idea what to expect. I had never had a breast exam before and I also had no idea what the experience at the doctors would be post COVID. I needn’t have worried.

We had a little chat as you do and the doctor led me to the consulting room, masks on of course, and I was asked to remove the top part of my clothing. After I had stripped my top half I sat on the couch, waiting, with my mask firmly in place. As I sat there the thought occurred to me that this must be a strange sight. I felt like I was taking part in some strange peep show, it was a bit chilly so Lucy and Ruby were standing to attention as if to say we’re ready for our close up.

I was prepared to hear that it was nothing to worry about and it was probably stress related. This is the standard response when I visit the doctors about a health concern.

The doctor returned, carried out her examination but in my head I was having a rave. You know when you have a song doing the rounds in your head…that was happening to me, the tune to the Prodigy classic, Smack my …up but the b word had been replaced with a t word and this helped me relax.

The doctor said that she could feel a lump behind the nipple so I was referred to the hospital for further investigation. The appointment was made for the 30 December for me to attend the breast clinic. The doctor was not particularly concerned, she seemed confident that there was not a sinister cause.

It would be a lie to say that I was not concerned. There were points where the potential consequences played on my mind. As much as I tried to hide it with humour I could not deny that I was scared. I tried really hard not to think about the upcoming appointment. I tried to keep myself busy and focus on Christmas and making it a special and memorable experience as possible. I did not want my fear and concern to have an impact on my family.

Nevertheless the night before my appointment I began to panic which prompted some conversations with my husband about all of the possibilities. I like to know that there is some form of a plan regardless, it gives me sense of direction if I have formulated an idea which, in theory, will help me to process the result.

On the day of the appointment I went to the hospital, filled in a questionnaire and met with another doctor. I was asked yet again to whip out the girls but this time rather than brave the cold I was provided with a cape to wear. Again, the doctor was very friendly and unconcerned. Due to my age I was not going to experience a mammogram, an ultrasound would be sufficient which I was relieved about as I have my doubts about whether it would be possible given how small my girls are.

So I had the ultrasound after donning my fetching cape once again. On a side note, I love the fact it was referred to as a cape, it made me want to do my superhero impersonation all the time. I did contain this urge given the surroundings and sombre atmosphere. I was just looking trying to keep my mind focused on something else other than how much of a fraud I felt sat in the waiting room.

Thankfully it was confirmed that the lump the doctor had felt was just a cyst, I was also told that there were 4 or 5 smaller cysts as well which are all completely benign. I opted to have the largest cyst drained as it was causing the pain and whilst it was unpleasant due to the position of the cyst behind the nipple, the pain was bearable and Booby Lucy is feeling much better now.

I am lucky that on this occasion it was only a cyst. I was advised that I will be susceptible to cysts in the future but I have also been strongly advised by all of the professionals that I must never assume that I know what a lump is. It is highly recommended that if I discover any lumps in the future or notice any other changes with my breasts that I contact my doctor for diagnosis.

Why am I oversharing this information with all of you? I have never paid much attention to my breasts. In addition, I had not discovered the lump myself and that was a scary revelation for me. The only reason that I decided to get checked out is because of something I saw in an Instagram Story.

The experience has highlighted to me the importance of taking time out for myself. I need to spend some more time on self care and checking my body out myself rather than ignoring what it may be telling me. I am so grateful that the poster was shared and I hope that by writing about my experience it will help to alleviate any fears that others may have. I hope it will anyway and if not, well I tried.

I am full of gratitude and relieved that the outcome was positive and I truly feel for anyone who has not been as fortunate as me however, if you notice anything that is different or if there is anything concerning you do not hesitate to go to the doctors.

I cannot say that any health checks that I have experienced have been pleasant but I do know that they are essential. There is an element of embarrassment with them all and the majority are in intimate regions of our bodies which fill me with dread. However, I would prefer to put my embarrassment to the back of my mind and receive an all clear result rather than carry on with my life not knowing that everything is a-ok and as it should be.

But that’s just me.